Wednesday, February 5, 2014

The Concept of Valentine's Day can be damaging to our students

I love the concept of Valentine’s Day being about love. But I think we can relieve the stress of Valentine’s day for children as they mature into young adults, by teaching them that Valentine’s day is about love and friendship. So  they don’t  grow up thinking if they are not in a relationship on Valentine’s day that they are alone, even though they have special friends around them.

Treat your children out for a special meal on that day or provide them with a special basket or gift, so that they can see that Valentine’s Day is more than a day based on relationships.

I understand that society has a great deal to do with this concept. But we have to remember as parents and teachers that our children and students are observing everything, and they are creating a perception of the world around them, based on our actions and what they see and hear.

Each year my son gets a present, card and a box of candy from me on Valentine’s Day, and a book which is a tradition in our house.

There are so many lonely people on this day, because of the commercial aspect of Valentine’s Day.  I believe that if we take special care in the way we approach any holiday, it would have a long lasting positive effect on our students and children as they grow into adulthood.

 I wasn't sure my son’s feeling about Valentine's Day, we never talked about it. So I decided to take this opportunity to talk with him now that he's older. 

I asked him "if receiving gifts for Valentine’s Day helped him understand what Valentine’s Day was about."

He said, “When I was a child I associated Valentine's Day with giving gifts decorated with hearts to someone you loved. I didn't know about the connection to romantic love until much later. You just never mentioned it.”

Then I asked him, "when he received gifts from me, while not in a relationship did it make him feel less lonely."

He replied, “I've never received gifts for Valentine's Day while in a relationship. But even if I had, my original thoughts about the holiday would persist. But to answer your question, it neither makes me feel more nor less lonely. It makes me feel more loved than if I got nothing.”

So in closing and based on my son’s responses, let’s make our students and children feel loved during each holiday and make them about family and friends. The whole concept about being in a relationship with someone during Valentine’s Day, can be damaging as they become young adults.

When I search the library for books on Valentine’s Day, I looked for books based friendships; they are listed below.

  Darla the Teacher *

1*2*3 Valentine’s Day Counting Book, by Jeanne Modesitt

In this delightful story Mr. Mouse takes you on a counting journey, he gives 10 special friends Valentine’s Day  gifts ending his journey with his family. 

The Day It rained hearts, By Felicia Bond

It rained hearts and Cornelia Augusta catches them and uses them to make special hearts for all her friends. A good book that shows Valentine’s Day based on friendship and all types of friends.


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